Who I am...

"I'm the one You love, 

I'm the one You love,

That will be enough.

I'm the one You love."

Remind Me Who I Am
Jason Gray

Be reminded friends, and never forget.

I know that You can give me rest...

My soul finds rest in God alone;
my salvation comes from him. (NIV)

Psalm 62:1

I found this verse etched in white across a sunset on Pinterest just now. The meaning it holds for me now is indescribable. My body, mind and spirit have never before been this exhausted. To find rest. It sounds delightful. It was another reminder to just be, with Him. "to run away, to find a place quiet to pray, a place that's lonely, where I can find You only." Jeremy Riddle "Always"

As is usual, I scrambled for my Bible to underline the verse. I was surprised after fighting with clingy pages when I finally arrived at the 62nd Psalm. It wasn't quite the same...

For God alone my soul waits in silence;
from him comes my salvation. (ESV)

Psalm 62:1

"Waiting? No, this version must be confused. Am I in the wrong chapter? I want to rest, not wait." My silly heart, and the words it feels. For Pete's sake. 

As soon as the words had been felt and flashed across my mind, I realized what was happening here. First of all, that there is a Greek word I need to look up. 

But even before I looked it up, I wondered, pondered. Waiting and resting. Why are these interchangeable? Waiting for me is a trial. Waiting in line, I dance, tap my feet, nervously tap my fingers on my can of soup (I eat a great deal of soup) and sigh as the man in front of me drops his coins all over the floor. Waiting is exhausting, I thought. Perhaps, it isn't supposed to be.

Perhaps waiting is supposed to be restful. How? Well, there is no time like a time of waiting, to learn trust and contentment. To understand that He is enough, more than enough really, more than I could have ever hoped for, is to rest. For waiting then becomes a time to bury yourself in His vast love.

duwmiyah, the word in question means  "silence, still, repose, still waiting" according to Strong's Concordance. True rest isn't found in bringing our problems to God. Yes, we MUST bring them to Him, but stopping after that is missing out on the rest. Rest is sitting in silence, waiting for Him. Content to simply be with Him. Yes, we have prayers, requests, confusion, frustration, but we have to trust Him. I have to trust Him. Whether He answers my questions, today or in 30 years, I have to learn contentment in His presence. 

Wait. Rest. Be silent. Dwell on the blessedness of your salvation, not the pain you are feeling. Don't ignore the pain, but don't let it be the tent you live in. Live in satisfaction. Just be. With Him.